His mother agreed, and I loved the idea — it felt like we were starting our life together in a home full of family history. We split expenses: I pay for groceries, childcare, and utilities, while he takes care of anything related to the house. I also give him a monthly amount for “household costs.” This arrangement has been in place for years, and I never thought twice about it — until last week.
I came home early from work and overheard him talking to his mother in the kitchen. I wasn’t trying to listen, but I froze when I heard her say, “It was a perfect move to marry her. She’s helping me keep up with the mortgage.
Thank her again.”
My heart sank. Mortgage? I waited until she left, then confronted him directly: “What did she mean by that?”
At first, he tried to brush it off.
But when I insisted, he finally came clean: the house isn’t actually his. It’s still under his mom’s name. And the money I’ve been giving him every month?
It’s been going toward her mortgage all along. I was stunned. I said, “You told me this was your house.”
And he said, “Well, you never asked who the owner was.”
I told him, “I didn’t ask because you told me it was yours.
Why would I even think to question that?”
He just shrugged and said, “We live here. That makes it our home. Why does it matter whose name is on the deed?”
I was stunned.
I told him it mattered because I’ve been unknowingly helping pay off his mom’s house for years. I believed we were building something together, but instead, I was just supporting his mother financially — without any transparency. He said I was overreacting, that I should be proud to help his mom, and that it wasn’t a big deal.
But to me, it is. It feels like a massive breach of trust. Now he’s accusing me of being selfish and blowing things out of proportion over something that “doesn’t change anything.” But it does — it changes everything.
Am I wrong for feeling completely betrayed and hurt by this? Source: brightside.me
